Connie’s Story

Dot is Connie’s mother-in-law, and one of her closest friends. They always did everything together, until the family started to notice changes in Dot’s personality and behavior. “It happened fast,” says Connie. “She developed full-blown Alzheimer’s and couldn’t be left alone.” Connie moved in with Dot to take care of her. As she became increasingly fearful, aggressive, and uncooperative, her care took a toll on Connie, now 71. “Dot stood by me when I needed her. I want to do the same for her. But being with Dot constantly for almost five years now is so stressful. And so hard to talk about.”

Deanna, a therapist with a program of United Way’s United for Caregivers initiative, designed to reduce caregiver stress, has been a tremendous help. During home visits she shares information about services that can help Dot and provide some respite for Connie. But Connie is most grateful for the way Deanna listens. Caring for a loved one who has Alzheimer’s Disease brings particular challenges, and Deanna’s compassionate presence helps Connie cope with her complicated feelings. “So many caregivers just soldier on. It’s so hard to talk about what you’re going through. You get numb after a while. Deanna’s there for me and nobody else. I can tell her anything. It’s such a relief.”